WTF? Elul????

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Maslow Hierarchy of Needs reference
Image by purpleslog via Flickr

This is the beginning of my introspective season.  I have just 30 days until Rosh Hashana (the Jewish New Year).  This mini-holiday is also the anniversary of my mom’s death and the coming of age of my eldest daughter.  It’s the start of the academic year.  Plenty of reasons to wonder:  Am I where I want to be?  But, the questions I will pose today are ones we all need to examine each and every day….“How much do we really need?”

I’ll give you a hint: we don’t need much. We don’t need a fancy car, we don’t need that fancy house, we don’t need that new smartphone. We don’t need much, when you really get down to it.

Here’s what we do need to live a fantastic life: good food, good shelter (something that feels like home- it doesn’t have to be a mansion), fantastic relationships with people we love, work that sends us to the moon, and, most certainly, a sense of tikun olam (leaving the world a better place than when we arrived.) [Notice the subtitle to my blog and our company website- that’s the definition in vernacular!]

That’s it. We really don’t need anything else.  (We are not talking about wants, right now.)

This past week, the East Coast of the US was subjected to an earthquake (the one right where the powers-that-be said I was nuts when I complained [minor understatement] when they chose that same site for a nuclear power plant) and then Hurricane Irene.  What did you consider protecting?  What were your thoughts at 1:52pm when your building shook?  Many lost their houses, their computers, had no work… all they had was the clothes (or pj’s) on their backs.

If that was you- and it certainly could have been- what you have have left after all that destruction?

Your relationships and you.

Our relationships are vital.  I think they’re the most valuable things we have (besides ourselves). If we lost everything, we’d still have our relatives (real or simulated) and friends to fall back on should we  need a place to stay, or need some help financially. We’d still have valuable contacts in our network to get a job again. (OK, I know the economy sucks and that is easier said than done, but you know what I mean). And, most importantly, they’d be there to provide the love and support that we are going to need- big time!

And, you know what?  Your house was not destroyed (I hope).  The river didn’t just flood you out, nor did the earthquake destroy your belongings.  But your friends and family ARE there to provide you the love and support to nourish your life.

And, even with all the tchotchkes you have, the single most most valuable possession you have is you. You are the best thing you’ve got!  Not that Lincoln MKX, not that executive jet- or whatever other toy you are dreaming to own.

You must insure that YOU are the hero of your own life.  No matter what happens, you have the skills and experience to build yourself back up.  Trust me on that! Even when faced with losses, you can bounce back- as long as we leverage our relationships, our skills, and our experiences.

So, what is the takeaway here?  Act as if we have nothing.  We must insure that we maintain those relationships (not a tweet- a phone call, a visit, a bottle of wine.)  Maximize OUR human capital (now, there’s a REAL return on investment).  Invest in what we really need to maximize the returns on OUR lives.  Ditch the rest- in the end, they don’t provide the return we each seek or need.

Roy A. Ackerman, Ph.D., E.A.

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16 thoughts on “WTF? Elul????”

  1. Disasters and hard times really help us put things in the proper perspective. You are so right when you say that relationships are our greatest treasures.
    I really love what you said ~ “No matter what happens, you have the skills and experience to build yourself back up.” That is a message that I needed to hear this morning. Thank you for another inspiring post, Roy!
    Janette Fuller recently posted..Book Review: The Kaizen Plan For Healthy Eating

    1. Janette:
      I am so glad that this found a resonating bell to help you.
      That is what this time period is supposed to be for me. To take stock of what is great, what is good, and what I need to fix. Which includes relationships and people and events that I have not handled well during the year. To make it possible to grow from this- to forgive others as I wish them to forgive me- and to use my skills and experiences to progress.
      Thanks for your lovely comments.
      Roy

    1. Karla, that always amazes me, as well.
      Those folks who are stranded in Vermont know what it means to have fundamental relationships. The folks who lost everything in Katrina were forced to come to grips with this,too.
      We need to focus on what’s really important- and relish each instance of our interactions.
      Thanks for your comments.
      Roy

  2. Yes Roy , we dont need so much in life. We must be true to ourselves and live the life that defines who we are.
    When all is said and done all we have are the people we hold dear in our hearts.

    1. You said it, Pamela. That is the essence of our lives.
      Only the Pharoah’s thought they could take their wealth and riches with them to the grave. Oh, they did- but folks got to plunder their leavings over the millenia.
      Keep your friends and loved ones close.
      Roy

  3. I don’t know what I would do without my relationships. I agree that they are atop of the need list. I have my God, my family, my friends. I am a rich person. I hope lots and lots of people read your reminder of this today.
    Bonnie Anderson recently posted..Do Not Bend

  4. Well said, Roy and so true. The floods hit very close to home here ( just 10 miles away) I have friends who cannot leave their town – supplies need to be air dropped to them. It’s truly incredible. This makes us all take stock in what really is important and you hit the nail on the head here. Thank you. ~ Suerae
    Suerae Stein recently posted..Versatile Blogger Award!

  5. Roy, WOW! This post speaks so dearly to my heart. It’s exactly what I thought about when the earthquake happened here in Peru last week and it’s exactly what I realized when I first came to Peru in the first place. Nevertheless, I *still* found myself accumulating material things when I settled into an apartment here. Now that we’re planning to move to the Peruvian coast, I’m looking forward to giving many things away.

    Just yesterday, I thanked my partner again for being a part of my life and told him how much I truly valued him. That’s what’s so important — saying the words too. =)

    Thanks for this lovely post!

  6. Hey Roy,

    This is exactly what I did this Eid! Called up everybody close and actually call them up – not facebook messaging and all! And celebrating Eid with Mom and Dad is a custom; can’t do it without them ever! Though I miss my brother (studying) and one of my sister (settled in California) but spending time with family has a special place of its own!

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