OK. Truth or Dare…. Don’t you wake up sometimes, in the middle of the night, scared s…less that someone is going to find out you’re a fake, that you’re not that perfect leader, the one with all the answers, the one who will lead the troops to the promised land?

If you said no- then you are lying to yourself. We all have those fears. We all try to do everything (even if we delegate), we all want to be perfect… and we know that is not even close to the fact. Because we are not perfect and we can’t do everything.

That is one of the reasons we don’t respond well to compliments, too. Because deep down, we wonder if they are really deserved. Because we know our failings. How can that person providing the compliment not see them, too?

The problem is if we have those fears too often. ‘Too often’ is different for each of us. But, the result of having those fears overtake us- for a moment, for an hour, for a day, for a week, or for a year…is that we work even harder. We become obsessed with getting things done, so no one will ever know that we are not that perfect, all-knowing leader we think they think we are.

Did you notice that construct? It’s not that everyone thinks we are perfect or all-knowing… It’s that we think they do. And, we are responding to how we think they think.

Now, I am not talking about our toddlers, our little kids. They do think we are perfect… until we put them in the corner for a ‘time out’. Then, we are picking on them. But, adults- even teenagers- they all know no one is perfect. (Unless they have a case of “Arrested Development”.)

Now, that does not mean you should go out and do all sorts of crazy things that will provide the world with your picture- or video- on TMZ, on Facebook, or the REAL news. But, we need to understand that we all want to be the best we can be- and we will all fall short.

When we do fall short, we apologize to those who may have been hurt and try not to repeat the same mistakes again. (You know the rule- only crazy people do the same things over and over expecting different results.)

When we receive a compliment, let it be validated. Thank the provider. And, realize that they know you are not perfect- and are providing you that approbation with the full knowledge that you deserve that compliment- now.

Given that today is Christmas, remember you may have been nice, you may have been naughty… but as long as your naughtiness didn’t reach the level of Bernie Madoff, Adolph Hitler, and those of that ilk, you are still human- with all the greatness and imperfections that so entail.

Happy Holidays.

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