Back when I was a tyke (you know, about 400 years ago), this was never a problem. Because back then, most moms stayed home and took care of the kids. I’m not saying this was great or right or wrong. I’m just saying it was.
As I got older, women began really entering the workforce. In big numbers. And, then, paid other women to take care of their kids.
As time went on, day care centers began proliferating. And, folks began agonizing over which center would be best for their kids. Even to the point (yes, it’s true- not just on movies) that they would register their kids for specific day care centers, as soon as they had a due date.
When my oldests were little (not quite 400 years ago), we arranged for them to go to day care. (Not living in New York, we didn’t have to sign them up before they were born.) And, the fees for that care were pretty steep. Especially for two folks just starting out in life (and on academic salaries).
By the time my youngest was to enter the world, we sort of emulated the New York experience. When my wife was 5 months pregnant, we began searching for and interviewing potential nannies. To be honest, we found the world’s best nanny. And, her pay was substantial- but at this point in time, we were successful business executives, so it was not traumatic. (OK. We had three others in private school- with tuitions that matched college tuition. And, one in public school. We were spending plenty on our kids. Worth every penny, but plenty.)
Then, my kids grew up and I stopped worrying about it. (Maybe I should mention that my ex-wife STILL employs that nanny!)
Until one day, my daughter told me she was dropping almost $20K to send my grandchild to nursery school. So, I began paying more attention. Finding out that my employees were spending a pretty penny for their kids, too.
These folks are not alone. There are about 8 million families employing nannies, using day care centers, and the like. Spending more money for their kids than they do for food. Having families evaluate how valuable that second working spouse may be, especially when the take-home pay covers little more than the cost of the day care required for that second spouse to work. (You do know that child care in some states runs about $ 20K a year- or twice the amount one would pay to have that child attend the local public college. And, here comes the big bite- many of these centers deliver their care with no well-educated or well-trained professionals. According to some data, that failure exceeds 85% of the US day care centers!).
Some companies are more enlightened. They run child care centers for their employee’s kids. Some do it for free, some at reduced costs. But, they do it to ensure that their staff shows up for work, has a great attitude, and values their employer.
Our politicians think they are addressing the issue. After all, they provide that generous $ 2000 child care credit. Which is about 10% of the cost for taking care of one kid.
We need to do more. For my kids. For your kids. And, for our country’s success.
I agree, it’s a problem. What’s also interesting is that the Mother paid someone else to care for the kids. If only it would be custom in western society for the Dad to pay the Mom to care for the kids…. (or vice versa) this would save a lot more than money…
Think about it… 🙂
Actually, it wouldn’t quite work. Because even though the second spouse (it makes no difference who is the “greater” breadwinner) may not make significant wages, if the pay is more than enough to cover the costs, it is critical. Because with one paycheck, that additional funds is now gone- and then there is diminished family capacity. If the second breadwinner doens’t cover the costs of child care, then having that person stay home is the absolute correct solution.
Although we don’t have children, I believe one of the two most important jobs in the world is to be a parent, but western culture does not see it that way. (I think the other most important job is to look after your parents.) Bringing up children as capable and responsible human beings is so important, but today’s parents face so many challenges. I don’t think the solution is more money for childcare. Perhaps being more flexible for parents will help, but, then again, they still have to earn money. Is there an easy answer?
I would have brought up eldercare, too, Robert, except, there is insufficient data as to the costs and needs. Most of it seems to fall upon children caring for their parents (at elast now they could be more financially able.)
I like the companies that offer day care on site. I’ve heard mom’s complain that day cares or babysitters charge too much but when you think about it, they are responsible for your child and why should they receive such little pay for such a big responsibility. I was lucky when our children were young. (that was probably 800 years ago if yours was 400) We owned our decorating business and they “worked” right alongside of hubby and me. If we had outside appointments, they would go with us and quietly sit in the corner with a coloring book (our girls were very well behaved, at least in public) The tradition continued when our youngest daughter was working with us, her children came to work with her. Now our 22 year old granddaughter, who still works with us, will bring her daughter to work too when she’s born next month. I think Alexandra is the only person to “retire” at 5 years old so she could attend kindergarten! I totally agree, daycare is expensive and if companies started day care, parents could also have lunch with their children!
martha recently posted..This Day in History July 18
I’m with you, Martha- but most of those firms are the larger ones. It’s very hard for smaller entities to provide child care. I do know of a few who pooled their resources together to offer great child care for their employees, though!
Thanks for the visit and the great comment.
Roy (as someone not yet a grandmother but with a grown son) it is past ridiculous. I feel for the single parents the most – they don’t have a choice, especially if they don’t have family to help out. I still shudder to remember a couple of the family daycares my husband and I interviewed (we used family day care for the most part) – we were able to walk away; what of those who ended up placing their children in them? We as a society spend more time and money on some worthless activities than on our most valuable asset – our next generation.
Alana recently posted..Your Wednesday Moment of Flowers
I always find it interesting how the a significant percentage of our population worries about a potential child before it is born (but never it’s nutrition in utero)= and then abandons all such concern once the child is within this world, Alana.
Dear Roy,
Great article. I like reading it. Keep up the good work.
Divya recently posted..Kapalbhati Pranayama
Thanks so much, Divya!